Kimbosue's Blog has MOOOOOVED!
Some posts are pw protected, so for the super secret decoder pen....ahem... code, please email me at kimbosue2 AT hotmail DOT com.
This blog will remain open. The link is still tied to lots of IF blogs, groups, and websites. I hope someone can read through my journey and find hope and strength and know that there is a light at the end of the IF tunnel. Prayer is the key! I love all my IF girlies I met along the way, and I hope to keep your friendships going forward during this next chapter of Mommyhood. I hope to see you there!
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
So we had the CD3 appointment/talk with Dr. H. He was very glad we called him over the weekend so we wouldn't have to skip this cycle due to bad timing. The scan showed no cysts (WHEW, I had thought this could be the reason for AF.) and both ovaries are quiet. The lining was also indicative of this just being a regular cycle. Thank God for small favors - although I would have preferred to have NOT seen her this month - at least there is nothing else wrong.
We discussed options at this point. There are 2 options from here.
- Repeat last month's treatment - clo.mid and meno.pur
- Injections only - no clo.mid and upping the meno.pur dosage throughout the cycle with extra u/s's
He left us to ponder these options while I was getting re-dressed. D and I decided on the injections only cycle because Dr. H did say that this would increase our chances by 20%, only because the additional injections would create additional eggies, thus a greater chance for one (or more) of them to fertilize.
We went into the Training Room with that option selected. When we told him what we wanted, he said that since I had performed so well last time, he would like to go with the same protocol again, only this time upping the dosage of Menopur.....ok....Why? He said that if we went with injections only, this would put us at doing the IUI late next week and he's out of town for a conference. He refers his patients to Dr. L in his absence, so the timing is not the issue. Dr. L only performs the IUI, all decisions are still made by Dr. H by phone. And he added that he would prefer to do the IUI himself, given he knows our history and our situation. I couldn't agree more! I trust him more since we've spent the last 4 months with him. Not to mention the thought of another strange man doctor up in the hoo hoo gives me the willies!!
I also asked how many IUI cycles he usually lets patients go through and he said usually 3 with clo.mid/injections and then 2 with injections only. If after those, you're still not pg, then it's time for IVF.
So we're on clo.mid CD3-7 and meno.pur x3 on CD5, 7 & 9. The scan is scheduled for 5/6 and the IUI on 5/10 or 5/11 - depending on the results of the scan.
- IUI #3
- my new highlights I got last night - bring on summer!
- that we need to remember that God won't give us more than we can handle.
Monday, April 28, 2008
Well, the d/c turned into full blown AF by Friday afternoon. No longer could I imagine that the color was still brown and caused from implantation. I mean, red is red, right? Not to mention the killer cramps that plagued me all of Friday night and into Saturday morning.
D called Dr. H Saturday morning. His office only has a recording and a "press 9" for an emergency option. Well, since technically we didn't know if this was some other type of bleeding or AF, he went ahead and had him paged. He called back within 5 minutes. I had D do the talking as I was still in blubbering state. Dr. H thinks its just AF (a week early) and to come in to the office on Monday. But my blood pg test was scheduled for TUESDAY because the nurse said he was on vacation on Monday?? I thought that was odd. Well, last night around 9PM, Dr. H called my cell and said he WAS on vacation Monday, but would meet me at the office at 2PM if I still wanted to. Sure, lets get this CD3 workup over with and go for Round 3.
In the matter of 45 minutes on Saturday morning, I had got 4 phone calls (2 friends, sister and Mom) asking how I was doing since they knew I was supposed to POAS that morning. I did, even though AF was going strong...you know there are rare cases where ladies are pg that have full cycles throughout their pregnancy...but it was still BFN. So I took the phone outside to call them back 1 at a time and tell the story, while crying in the garden, 4 different times. Each one had their own advice, all of which was good, but it still didn't take away the hurt.
This roller coaster of emotions and the constant waiting - waiting for AF to come, waiting for b/w results, waiting for HPT windows........waiting. I am still waiting for my baby.
Friday, April 25, 2008
Yesterday afternoon I had some brown d/c. I was freaking out because I wasn't prepared for it nor have any idea what it was. Google MD told me that it was more than likely implant.ation d/c. Of course, I only believed that after 25 sites told me the same thing. D was so excited! He was jumping around and (for those of you that know him) was doing his one-handed-clap thing!
So this morning, I gave in and POAS. ONLY because it said that a positive HPT can be received after a successful implant.ation. I am not sure at this time if it was successful or not as the HPT was B-FREAKING-N. I cried on the toilet after that. I tried REALLY hard to imagine even the faintest of 2nd lines there and I just couldn't do it. I threw it away and got in the shower. Of course, after the shower I dug it back out of the trash to see if maybe I was still too sleepy to have seen it the first time or maybe it took more than the recommended 3 minutes to appear....but nothing.
D told me to stop taking them because I am only making myself upset every time its BFN. But good news maybe is that apparently the hc.g levels could still be too low for an HPT to pick up and I still could be pg. A blood pg test (beta) is most accurate in these situations.
Today I will don my suit of armor including shield and sword to fight off all further urges to POAS this weekend! (What a LONG weekend this will be.) And wait for the beta on Tuesday....
- Zoe, our 350z, who helped me get to work really fast this morning. AKA I took out my BFN frustrations on my gas pedal.
- The garden - we have baby tomatoes, bell peppers, strawberries and onions.
- Spring time - the weather is so perfect!
Thursday, April 24, 2008
So I have a couple of things I want to explain and none of them really go together per se... so just deal with it, OK?
Tuesday night I had a very strange, but vivid dream. It was a 2 part-er, but all the same dream. The first part, Dean and I were seeing a movie in a theater that was on the 2nd floor of some mall. The theater was HUGE though - like Alley Theater huge. So there are 3 divided sections of this theater - left, right, middle. We're in the right section. Apparently its an intense movie as the middle section starts to RIOT. Yes, jumping up and down and screaming. They jumped so hard that the middle section fell THROUGH the 2nd floor of the mall and landed on the first floor. Then all the rioters were pissed and yelling they were going to sue even though they were the ones to cause the accident. Weird, I know. The next part is only me and I ran into my old 7th grade Math teacher - Ms. Vaught. Ms. Vaught was considered to be the hot teacher in our school. She was very pretty and had a lot of junk in her trunk if you know what I mean. Anyways, she tells me she is pregnant (which is odd because that would make her about 45 years old at this time) and I tell her I am too (really? news to me!). She then invites me back to her condo which is total 80's style - like gold, mirrors, etc. I shut the door behind me with this big sliding bar across (like a dungeon or something) and then flip a switch that LIFTS us to the 2nd floor - not like an elevator - but just the part of the floor we were standing on...lifted. We start talking about our babies and then asks me for a drink? uh - hello aren't WE pregnant? Oh yes right. Then she shows me her bedroom. It has a giant circle bed in the middle. So then I'm thinking all those rumors in junior high about her being a freak - must be true. Because the only person I know that has a bed like that is Austin Powers and he IS a freak! And then the alarm went off... So for all you dream interpreters out there....what the HELL??
In case any of you paid attention to the pics of the 4 wheeler yesterday....yes, that was a PILLOW in place of the seat. The seat flew off during transport to the cook off. So D put down some cardboard and strapped a pillow with bungee cords! Total redneck/ghetto but it was funny!! Not so funny since it's my dad's 4 wheeler, we now have to replace the seat at full cost. No, EBay doesn't have any... so $130 later...
A very disturbing scene at the RE's office on Monday... there was a lady breast feeding! I know some people think its cool and their right to do it in public places...but come on! The baby was in one of those sling things and let me just say that the lady did not have nursing shirt or bra on! The entire breast was flopped out for all to see. Gross. Didn't she have a blanket available? I am sure there was SOMETHING in that diaper bag she could have used to cover up!
That's all my rants for the day. Hope everyone has a good one!
- LOST is back with a new episode tonight!
- Pot roast is simmering in the crock pot for dinner.
- Tomorrow is FRIDAY!
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
So the Prog.esterone results are in...............
- Not enough HCG to register yet
- It was a PM test instead of first morning pee
- I drank a quart of iced tea before I took it so I would have enough!!
Then as I waiting the full 2 minutes, I am reading the instructions and it says to not drink lots of fluids before testing because it could dilute the hcg and not read it! UGH!
So I am going to gather up all my courage and NOT POAS until at least......Saturday...maybe...if I can wait that long......
Monday, April 21, 2008
The cook off this weekend was a blast. We didn't get home until after 12 every night since Thursday!! There was good food, good music, and good times had by all. I am still sad that I didn't get to participate in the margarita judging because there were some yum-o entries. But Vamplita said it best in her comment! Pics coming soon... The most fun was when we were judging Showmanship. Bu.bba Chu.bs cooking team had a pirate theme and most of the team were in full pirate garb. They served us grog from pirate skull cups and we played "Are You Smarter Than a Pirate?" We had to answer pirate questions, could confer with the pirate galley, and then my friend S had to "walk the plank" on the way out. They had laid a 2x4 in their gate and she had to walk it out of their booth. It was quite funny given that she is currently in a walking boot from a displaced bone in her foot!
Today is CD22 and 7DPIUI. I went in for my prog.esterone b/w this morning. Should have the results this afternoon. (Just called and they are still not in. GRRRR!!) The u/s is scheduled for 4/29. I'm crossing everything I got, praying and sprinkling baby dust on my little head!!!
It's also 9DP the trigger shot, which means I can POAS tomorrow!! "They" say the hcg from the trigger leaves your system 7-10 days after the shot. I'll be collecting some pee sticks on the way home fo' sho'!
- pee sticks
- LOST is back with a NEW episode this week!
- Family BBQ @ our house this weekend to plan the upcoming camping trip!
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Today starts Sou.th Be.lt Co.ok O.ff at Tom Bass Park. It's a BBQ cook off that raises money to pay for the July 4th fireworks display in the Sou.th Be.lt/Sagemont area. There are about 75 cook teams this year. My friend, D, and myself are on the committee. Unlike other rodeos with cook offs which have a committee per function, there is only 1 team for this cook off and we do it all! From sponsorships, to ice runs, to BBQ/margarita judging. We'll be there all weekend, starting today around 1. Maybe some of you can come out and enjoy the festivities!
When we started talking to Dr. H about IUI #2, I was looking at my calendar and just KNEW that SBCO week was going to be the week it happened. I am both happy and sad because I REALLY wanted to judge margaritas! But I REALLY want a baby more! Oh well, there's always next year! I'll just be toting my Bubba Keg of Iced Tea around with me!
Here's to a fabulous weekend!
- Iced Tea by the keg full
- Sou.th Be.lt Co.ok O.ff
- Awesome weather this weekend!
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Me and my love
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
So I had my last glass of wine last night... I would have preferred it be a better tasting, better maker, better type, and better flavor.....Alas, it was all that Bu.ddy Ru.ff's could muster up for me. It was both a sad and a happy time. Happy because it means I may be pregnant for the next 10 months and have my very own baby! And sad because we are such wine lovers and I will miss it...Remember this Good Day and this Winery Weekend??? We have tons of bottles we have yet to drink from our winery trips, not to mention our very own homemade wine that is still resting peacefully in the wine rack. A more positive thought is that by the time I CAN drink it, it will be more aged and taste even better!
This was brought on because a friend had told me that her doc said she could have a glass of red wine every day of her pregnancy. My RN sister told me last night, more like 1 a month. This got me curious as I have never actually asked my doc, however Google MD provided me with ample information:
Do Not Drink Alcohol While Pregnant
Do Not Drink Alcohol While Pregnant
Do Not Drink Alcohol While Pregnant
Do Not Drink Alcohol While Pregnant
All of the above articles, obviously had the same message: ANY amount of alcohol can hurt your baby. So to all my friends and family - this makes me your official DD!! The 2WW has officially began!
Mel at Stirrup Queens and Sperm Jesters posted a "Fess Up Week" post during her Friday Round Up. I would like to do the same. For all you lurkers, stalkers, readers, however you want to categorize yourself.... FESS UP! Let me know that I am at least a tiny bit interesting and that you do stop by from time to time and read the ramblings of my life!
Post a comment and send a shoutout!!
Monday, April 14, 2008
We finished IUI #2 today. D's swimmers were better than ever! 16 million (up from 2M before Prox.eed) and at 55% motility. My right ovary that had the 2 bigger follies looked like it was ovulating again. We also saw some fluid behind the uterus and doc said that indicates ovulation also. We saw the swimmers inside right where Dr. H put them. As I have never seen anything else in my uterus, this made me very excited to see them there, right where they should be, swimming towards their goal!
During the 20 minutes you have to lay there afterwards, hubby was saying "Go guys, Go!! Swim towards the goal! Get the ball (aka egg. Me - "huh"? D - "well it LOOKS like a ball") Get the ball boys, get the ball!!" Hopefully they listen to Daddy!
Last IUI, I took the whole day off work and did nothing but stay horizontal on the couch. Subconsciously, I was thinking the guys might "fall out" if I was upright too much. D waited on me hand and foot and even made dinner. This time I came to work after the appointment. I want to continue my regular activities and not focus so much on what is going on down there.
I guess I am trying not to jinx myself either. The same reason why I didn't bring home "10,0001 Baby Names" book from my friend L's house yesterday. I found it on her bookshelf and flipped through it a minute. She said I could take it home, but I thought I'd better not. I don't want any prego anything in my house until I get my BFP!!!
Husband and I have been chatting on IM the past few minutes. I am actually laughing out loud at him! Here's an abbreviated version:
D: did you do this? Injectable gonadotropins
me: yes that is what menopur is
me: what website are you reading?
**what he types in the next couple of messages are quotes from the website**
D:Insemination combined with ovarian stimulation with injectable gonadotropins provides better pregnancy rates (and higher multiple pregnancy rates)
D:higher multiple pregnancy rates
D:higher multiple pregnancy rates
D:higher multiple pregnancy rates
D:higher multiple pregnancy rates
D:presumably more sperm make it to the area in the fallopian tube where they can take a crack at having a successful date with the egg(s).
D:awww, they're having a date now
D:think they will kiss on the first date
me: they better be humping on the first date
Here's to a Great First Date!!!
- IUI #2
- Girl Time - lunch, wine, and pedi with my good friend L
- Sister Time - dinner tonight with her and BIL
Friday, April 11, 2008
R ovary: 19x21, 17.16, and 5 less than 6
L ovary: 13x14, 7x7, and 6 less than 6
The follies have grown in 2 days! The meno.pur is really helping them along. Dr. H gave me another to take tonight, then we trigger ovulation tomorrow at 8:00, BMS that night, and then inseminate Monday morning @ 10!!
This weekend is NOT going to go by fast enough!!!
- Dr. H - no need for more today. He gets all my gratitude.
Thursday, April 10, 2008
The clinic called with the b/w results:
Technically at this point, I don't think the numbers really mean diddly-squat, but it's nice to know I am at least producing these hormones on my own.
I finalized our Family Camping Trip plans today. My parents, sister and bro-in-law, aunt & uncle (possible cousin sighting), and Dean and I are camping old school style in tents on Lake Livingston for Memorial Day weekend, May 23 - 26. My parents and us are taking our boats so there will be lots of fishing, tubing, and cruising going on!
- Tomorrow is FRIDAY
- IUI #2 is within reach
- Los Cu.cos' salsa (I had to throw that in there so Dean could be jealous!)
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Back from the clinic for b/w and u/s...
Lining – 6.3 – starting estrogen twice a day starting today to help thicken
R ovary follicles – 15x16, 10x11, 10x10, 8x8
L ovary follicles – 12x12, 10x10, 8x8
2 more Menopur shots tonight and tomorrow to help with more follie growth.
Another follow up (u/s) Friday to check follies again.
And if they look good, then I’ll trigger ovulation and do the insemination on Saturday or Sunday!
Dr. H said again how rare it was for what happened last month where he SAW the egg ovulating, but then it really didn't. He said, "Isn't it amazing how much things can change? You look so much better this month" meaning my purdy little follies!
- My purdy little follies!
- Leftover birthday cake YUM-O
- That hubby can do laundry while working from home :-)
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Yesterday was the Home Opener for the Astros 2008 season. As you can see, I was in the spirit! We almost lost it in the end, but pulled out a "W" for Wandy and beat the Cards, 5-3 in the 9th.
2 shots down and 1 to go. The last of the Meno.pur is tonight. Hopefully with this and the Clo.mid that finished up on Saturday will be the stimulation my little follicles need! I have a follow up tomorrow morning for b/w and u/s to make for sure I am responding correctly to the meds.
Things are baby-mania in my house again. I am hosting a baby shower for my friend SH this weekend. It's a Texas/Cowboy theme as this is only the 2nd person born in TX in their family. They are both from NOLA, as is most of their family. This is for their Texas Family to be able to celebrate with them.
We had a good weekend. We were able to take the boat out both Saturday and Sunday. Saturday, sister and S and D took it to the San Ber.nard River, about 40 minutes from the house. It was a gorgeous day and we just cruised the river taking in sun! On Sunday, we took it out to the San Jac.into River and met up with another friend who has a boat. He brought along 8 or so of his friends as well. We were able to "park" it on a sand bar and hang out with the other boats. There was dueling stereos going on! His boat also knee/wakeboarded. The water was too chilly for me to want to go that far in the water. Hopefully as the weather warms up, the water temp will follow shortly.
- Baseball season has finally started. YAH!
- Summer work schedule 9/80's with every other Friday off so we can plan lots of out of town trips!
Friday, April 4, 2008
After 19 years..........
The New Kids on the Block are doing a reunion tour! They appeared on the Today Show this morning and made the official announcement. There's a link to the interview on their web page. I know I'm showing my age by posting this, but this was THE group to love when you were a teenager in the early 90's. With hits like Hangin' Tough, The Right Stuff, Cover Girl, Step by Step...these guys were the original Boy Band of Boy Bands. Before N*Sync and The Backstreet Boys...there was NKOTB. I had some pins, posters and T-shirts from those days. Not anymore though...those were sold away in garage sales many moons ago. Although, on the Today Show, there were plenty of 20-30 somethings waving their old NKOTB loot around. It brought back many junior high memories...
I already got an email from one friend that said she is flying, driving, running, or walking to the nearest concert when they release the tour schedule. I am so there with you J!!
Like Joey said, "The Block is Back!"
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Every day I am amazed at the wide world of strong infertile people out there. I read about the U.T.E.R.U.S fundraiser and I think I'm going to have to dig up something to donate! Please click the link, read what its all about, and donate to a worthy cause! These women are fabulous!
Husband said that the Menopur sent from the pharmacy in Phoenix arrived this morning. That was super fast! almost faster than if I dropped off at C.V.S. I am not looking forward to the mixing of the stuff. I am sure it will be fine after I do it the first time...Anyone else mixed their own Menopur before?
- That my prescription plan covers the IF drugs with just a copay
- That the Proxeed worked for the swimmers and now only have me to fix
- NO CYSTS on CD3
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
So today was CD3 workup. Yes, the answering service chick only scheduled b/w when I needed to have an u/s too...that took some coordinating since I wasn't "scheduled" to have one done. But they worked me in, and that's all that matters.
Here are the results:
NO CYSTS!! WAHOO
Lining - 3.5
R ovary - 5 follies
L ovary - 3 follies
And that is without having started the meds yet. Go Ovaries! They took blood to test for FSH and Estro.gen. Should have those numbers back tomorrow.
I start 100mg of Clo.mid today - CD3 - CD7 with double shots of Meno.pur CD5, CD6, and CD7. EEK - this means more self-administered shots at home and done by me since hubby is deathly afraid of needles. The Meno.pur is currently en route from a fertility pharmacy and I should have them tomorrow. The nurse gave me another demonstration on how to mix them - the drug is actually in powder form that has to be mixed with a water solution in order to inject it. The needle she was using was GI-NOR-MOUS. I was like, "that is WAY bigger than the last needle" but the she said that is just for mixing and the injecting needle is tiny. WHEW! After that, I go back to the clinic to do another u/s and b/w on April 9th to verify that my body is reacting correctly to the meds.
We should be doing our 2nd IUI during the 3rd week of April!